This is gonna be a quick one. As I was preparing myself for my next album review, I did some research and I got to Jay-Z. This guy was never actually important to me: he was that type of guy that stood in the outskirts of my preferences; I couldn’t care less of what this guy did or does. But alas, I was, at that time that my hatred for him started to become what it is, I was getting into Linkin Park. Of course it’s not perfect by any stretch of the word, but it had some good songs, like In The End, Numb, Points of Authority, Breaking the Habit, you know, the more famous of their singles. And, in 2003, I was really looking forward to their next release, with Meteora in hand (again, not a perfect album, but heck, it had some good moments). One year later, Collision Course went out. Oh, fucking hell. Who, in hell’s god forsaken name, thought this could be a good idea? Linkin Park’s electronic aspect, in my opinion, should be forgotten to become a full-fledged rock band, but in this case, they decided to enhance that and add Jay fucking Z to the mix. If it’s not pretty clear to everyone, it is THE album that most Linkin Park fans pretend that did not happen. And when an album like “Minutes to Midnight” is considered a better album, you know you got yourselves a worse than feces album.
Okay, but that is history, right? No. Jay-Z, even though he did not stop to release an album after the other (oh, I’m sorry, I don’t know if they are shitty, so I didn’t add a shitty back there. Fact is, I don’t fucking care if he’s good or not on his own by this point). And actually, I’m okay with that, just stay the fuck out of what I listen and that will be okay. In fact, he did a Remix album called JaydioHead, but since I don’t really care for noise (yeah, Radiohead is noise, you know it), I couldn’t care less to it. But the thing is, I was looking for information on some Metallica albums. Truth is I was sort of unfair to Metallica all around, because it never suited my taste, but maybe it has something on it. And then, I found about an album that is a mix between Metallica and the Beatles called The Gray Album.
And I thought to myself “Wow, that’s a really shitty idea”. Yeah, I did. I haven’t heard it yet, but come on: if you believe that Metallica and the Beatles mix well together, then maybe you enjoy Collision Course. That doesn’t change the fact that I looked to find it, but then I found some notes on the net saying that it has no copyright over the Beatles parts, so you can download it for free of the internet without any remorse. That sounded odd to me, but okay, let’s go with that: James Hetfield decided “Fuck the Beatles, I’ll do whatever the hell I want” and didn’t get the rights on the Beatles songs, even though probably they would’ve said its okay. I want you to notice how ignorant I was to what I was doing still at this point. As I started to listen it, I fucking learned the truth.
Apparently, Jay-Z released “a Capella” versions of his best known songs, so to make it easier for amateurs to make mash-ups and remixes. He deliberately gave a permission letter for people to fuck with whatever the fuck they wanted to. And so, Danger Mouse, a producer, released a fucking Gray Album, which is Jay-Z and the White Album. Why?
The songs are fucking terrible. I wish I could say that the songs with less Jay-Z and more Beatles are good, but the production and recording quality is so low that it sounds as if Danger Mouse was recording them with a needle floating on a little boat while he flushing a toilet. Lo-Fi would be saying the least. And while I try to be somewhat of a rap critic, and attempt at trying to understand if he’s a good rapper, but he isn’t. It’s bad, tending to horrible. This guy should be nailed to an electric chair.
And I’m thinking: who the fuck is responsible for this shit? Is it Danger Mouse, that made the recordings, or is it Jay-Z, that probably listened to this crap and endorsed it? I’m willing to blame them both: stop fucking around with the stuff that I enjoy. There is some stuff that you don’t fuck around arbitrarily: The White Album is one of them. And the worse fucking part is that this album is considered to be good. HAVE YOU FUCKING LISTENED TO IT? Even Paul McCartney endorsed this shit. “Plagiarism is the best form of flattery” my ass. This record is crap. Stop listening to it. Or, if you fucking want to, you know what would be better than this? Doing the same shit as Collision Course. Get Jay-Z, get McCartney, shit, get even Danger Mouse if you feel the need to call that fuck face into this mess, and release a better album. With McCartney there, I’m sure it would be better than this fucker. And record that shit right! There’s no fucking excuse to this “gray album”.
Sorry about the rant, this shit just got into my radar recently.